Friends Who Took Care of Me

I could write so many posts about the friends who took care of me during this process.  If you have a brain tumor, you probably understand how awkward it is to start telling people you have a brain tumor.  It completely kills the conversation.  It makes everything about you.  Not very many people can say, "Oh I had a brain tumor too!"  Though you will start to find that many people can tell you about their aunt, uncle, cousin, friend, or someone they know on Facebook who also had a brain tumor.  Even the EMT for my brother's football team had a brain tumor.  I never thought about brain tumors until I had one, and then I felt like everyone knew someone with a brain tumor.  Whether people have had personal or secondhand experience with brain tumors, people are generally empathetic.  And some people went out of their way to be helpful and kind, especially on days when I absolutely felt alone and scared.  Here are some examples, though this is far from being a complete list:

• She came to walk with me when I returned to Oregon, and when I couldn't walk, she brought me back to my house and talked with me until I felt better.  After my surgery she came once a week for several weeks to help with my boys, my laundry, and other things around the house.  She was there to listen to me and also to let me rest.
• When I was in the hospital in Utah, I texted a friend who had had brain surgery a few years prior.  She was comforting and invited us over for dinner the day we got home from our trip.  She made us a freezer meal, texted me and stopped by to make sure I was okay, brought me flowers for my porch, and asked for any tips I had when her sister-in-law was having brain surgery a few months after mine.  
• When she heard about my brain tumor she immediately offered to bring dinner, called me at a time when I felt so desperately alone, walked to my house to say hi and bring a treat, took me for tortoise-slow walks during my recovery period, picked me up to go get a caramel apple spice and chat, shared stories about when her daughter had surgery right after birth, watched my boys, and did so many other things that I can't even remember.
• My friend who lost her newborn daughter a year earlier brought me a treat and beautiful flowers and texted throughout the process to see how I was doing.
• The women from my church organized a meal train to bring us 18 meals over a period of six weeks.  People signed up for all 18 meals in less than 12 hours.  Some women brought activities for my kids or special treats.  We didn't even know all of these people before my surgery, and we were blessed with so many new friendships throughout the process.
• A friend and neighbor took me to my son's school several times before I could drive so I could pick him up.  She became one of his favorite people, and now we swap treats whenever we have extras.  She makes some of the best cinnamon rolls and is at the top of M's list if he needs a ride home from school.
• Another friend and neighbor came to my house to stay with my boys when I went in for surgery and came over several times at a moment's notice to stay with one or both boys if I had to go to the doctor.
• Another friend, neighbor, and mom of two little ones offered to watch my boys for several hours each day for weeks after I came home from the hospital because our nanny situation never worked out.  
• My best friend from college has texted and called for months and sent us a gift card so we could pick up a few extra meals without a lot of preparation.  
• A friend from high school sent a hilarious card that made me smile.
• People all across the world (literally) prayed for me.  I felt loved and strengthened by so many prayers.
• A friend called me before my surgery and said, "I know people are going to help with meals, but I want to do something more for you.  I have these times open in my schedule.  Pick a time for me to come over each week and help you with whatever you need."  This friend has health problems of her own, but went out of her way to help me when I couldn't even bend over.

I could go on, and at some point I probably will go on about all the ways people served me during this time.  Friends have made this experience not only bearable, but valuable.  It can be hard to be on the receiving end of service, but I have felt so loved and I feel closer to so many people because they have helped me so much.